Still not buyin it

Marc Anthony and Jennifer Lopez used their appearance at the Inauguration's Western Ball to once again deny that their marriage is in the shitter.

Marc brought Jennifer up on stage to perform a duet with him, introducing her as "my wife." After their performance, they kissed and Marc commented "Man, she's cute" as Jen left the stage.

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Because they think we are dumbasses

J-Lo and Marc Anthony attempted some damage control by taking a "romantic getaway" to Puerto Rico over the holidays.

Their reps have told PEOPLE, that despite all the rumors (and both publicly seen not wearing their wedding rings) that they doing "great."

Divorce announcement in 3.......2.........

Who told Marc Anthony he had to lose baby weight?

I hope J-Lo's calling Sally Struthers. "Just 79 cents a day, the price of a cup of coffee, could feed Marc Anthony! Won't you help?"

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J-Lo to compete in triathlon/conceived naturally

Jennifer Lopez is already working on getting back into shape after giving birth to twins - She's hired a trainer and is even planning to compete in a triathlon in six months!

She told People magazine she is planning to enter "probably in October, September/October... I want my babies to be proud of me."

Um, J-Lo, they'll be six months old! They'll be throwing their poop!

J-Lo also has dismissed claims that she and Marc used in-vitro fertilization: "It was natural. We didn't do in vitro, which I know was reported. Everybody assumed that because we had twins. I wanted to have a baby, but I've always said exactly what I said all those years they (reporters) asked us since we've been married: 'Well, when are you guys gonna have some kids?' 'When it happens naturally, I guess!'

Uh-huh..

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Here's Max and Emme!

People got the first pictures of Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony's twins, for the bargain price of $6 million dollars!

J-Lo Popped!

Jennifer Lopez finally gave birth to her twins early this morning in Long Island, NY. She had a girl and a boy. The girl came first at 12:12 a.m. and weighed 5lbs, 7oz. The boy was born at 12:23 a.m. and weighed 6 lbs.

Jennifer's manager released the following statement to PEOPLE, "Jennifer and Marc are delighted, thrilled and over the moon." Poor J-Lo, it always has to be about her ass!

Expect to see photos of the babies once the couple is able to finalize negotiations with the highest bidder and the sale price is reportedly up to 6 million dollars! Wow!! Who needs to make records when you can just make babies! Once that deal is secured, they will release the names of the babies. Right now the going rate is around 2 million dollars. For each name.

Congrats to the delighted new parents. Hopefully they got Jen's looks.

What? She's pregnant?

The secret is out! Jennifer Lopez has finally confirmed she and Skeletor are expecting a baby!!

While on stage at a concert in Miami, Jen said "Marc and I are expecting." Marc then kissed the bump and added"I didn’t know she was going to talk".

Thank god, now we can all sleep at night!

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BumpWatch

Still has not confirmed pregnancy.

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Puffy wants to be J-Lo's baby bump's Goddiddy

Diddy has spoken out with his opinion that former girlfriend Jennifer Lopez will make a "great mother" even though she still has not confirmed her pregnancy.

Diddy said, "She's going to make a great mother. She is one of the most caring people I've ever met. When I went out with her, I saw that quality. I'm extremely happy for her, and I will be sending some expensive god-daddy presents to her baby." (Don't you have enough kids to take care of dude?)

I bet he sends the kid some toy guns (with bling, of course) to remind Jen of that time they got busted at Club New York. Ah, good times.

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The jig is up J-Lo

Just announce the damn pregnancy!

More JLo pregnancy rumors

PAGE SIX reports that and insider says Jennifer Lopez, is planning to "announce that she and Marc Anthony are expecting their first child on Saturday night at her Madison Square Garden concert."

To add to the baby rumors, a fan that attended her concert in Connecticut Wednesday night said they could definitely see a baby bump:"...a fan blew the side of her top all the way up for a moment, and a definitive baby bump was there. She was very quick to push down her top. Then she talked about how this year is full of firsts for her . . . and every so often her dress would fly up and you would see her belly."


In other baby news, Christina Aguilera still has not confirmed that she is pregnant.




Um, yeah, keep em guessing Xtina!

That's a whole lot of Desitin!!

In Touch Weekly is reporting that Jennifer Lopez is pregnant!!

An insider claims that J-Lo and Marc learned of the pregnancy after visiting fertility specialist Dr. Robert Katz and receiving the results of an ultrasound performed on September 12th. The test calculated that she was about 12 weeks pregnant.

The source also said that the couple has been trying to get pregnant for the past two years, and eventually turned to in vitro fertilization.

But wait, there's more! In Touch also reports that it could be twins! "The way the fetus is lying made it difficult for the doctor to tell if there was more than one baby in there" a "pal" added.

Now please don't take this as fact. I did some extensive research via Google, and found this . (check the date) Seems In Touch really, really, really wants a baby J-Lo.

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I do hope it is true though. Jen has wanted a baby for a very long time. Plus, judging by this composite, look how adorable the little bundle of alegría will be!:

She didn't really say that, did she?

In an interview in the August 2007 issue of Glamour magazine, Jennifer Lopez says that while she is not pregnant, she's pretty sure everybody wants her to get knocked up because the future of the world depends on her eventual offspring with husband Skeletor, um, I mean Marc Anthony.

When asked about the pregnancy rumors, Jenny replies with this thoughtful piece of verbal diarrhea, "Marc and I just saw Children of Men. The message of the movie was if we don't have children, there's no hope for the future. And without hope, society just goes to pieces. Maybe that's what the pregnancy rumors are about---hope for future."

Methinks she's been hanging out with Tom and Katie a wee bit too much.

Don't call her J-Lo, she's just a simple Latina

Jennifer Lopez recently told Britain's The Guardian newspaper: "I'm not J.Lo any more. That's all gone with all the ridiculous stories about tantrums and Egyptian sheets. That's all my past. I'm Jennifer Lopez. I think, as a woman, I've finally grown more sure of who I am. It does seem ironic that it has taken me more than a decade to basically get back to who I am. I am incredibly proud of my culture and I think I am a woman who is totally defined by my culture. My temperament, my body shape, the way I am is all very much Puerto Rican."

Hmmm, the timing of this is kinda suspicious.

Let's activate the Asshat Hollywood celeb quote translator: "Please un-ban me from the Spanish record stores--those are the only ones that are going to buy my new album because it's not in English!!! I'm Latina, look!!! Look at my ass!! I'm Jenny from the block! Just with mink eyelashes and a Bentley, but look at the ass!! The ass is still there. That's a Puerto Rican ass! I even married a Spanish guy! Actually I married two of them! Maybe three, wait, was Cris Judd part Latin? Um, I love tacos too! Oh and remember when I played Selena? El lapiz es rojo!! El lapiz es rojo!!"

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We get it. You're in love with El Esqueleto.

The 500 people who bought tickets to see Jennifer Lopez perform at New York's Spotlight Live on Tuesday night to promote her first Spanish-language album 'Como Ama Una Mujer (How a Woman Loves) may have been rethinking their purchase when Jen decided to bring Marc up on stage to give them a repeat performance of their Telemundo Grammy performance.

FROM PR Inside:
' Jennifer thanked the crowd, which included her mother and sister, for coming and was interrupted by a call of "I think you're so cute" from the audience. Jennifer replied: "And my husband is here." After her first song the 37-year-old said: ''The next song is a little treat. In a second you'll see why.'' She was joined on stage by Marc, 38, and they performed a romantic duet during which he pulled her into an embrace and they gazed into each other's eyes.

When the song ended Jennifer said: ''How you like them apples? That's my baby, for better or for worse!'' After the concert the couple partied in the VIP area, drinking champagne and feasting on giant puffs of pink cotton candy, marbled 'monkey bar' brownies, chocolate-dipped donuts and milkshakes in shot glasses. '

I think a better treat would have been if they shared the monkey bar brownies with the audience instead.

$CIENTOLOGY UPDATE

IN (?):

Well, she's already got the perfect outfit!

Rumor is that J-Lo and Ratboy are looking into joining Scientology. Now a report is out that Jennifer's father has been a Scientologist for 20 years.

"It's weird people want to paint [Scientology] in a negative way," Jen is quoted as saying. "It's just sad that people would look at it in that way."

I don't know which is be more annoying: the whole Bennifer thing or J-Lo as a S$ientologist. Tough one.
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OUT:


From The New York Daily News:

Victoria Beckham is telling pals she has no intention of joining the Church of Scientology, despite her close friendship with Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes. "There's no way I'd spend any money on that nonsense," she told a friend recently about the faith founded by author L. Ron Hubbard.

Says another pal: "It's completely laughable that there's even talk of her becoming a Scientologist. Just because people are friends with someone doesn't mean they do everything they do. Scientology is like kabbala in that it's become all about money. Kabbala bracelets are now $28! It's a joke." '

Ut oh, Tom's gonna be pissed about that one. I bet he'll make Katie stop being friends with Posh.

AAAACKK!! GET OUT OF HERE!!!