Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Everything that is wrong with music today

So KANYE WEST... beat my boy Axl in the race for #1 album (in this country anyway. Chinese Democracy went platinum in Finland bitches!) While Axl remains missing, Kanye is currently having his head measured to so his asinine Star Trek glasses can be refitted to accommodate his (even more) expanded head.

KANYE is so impressed with his new album, 808s and Heartbreak, that he has reportedly turned his back on the hip-hop genre altogether, as he claims it has become a "cliche," and will now focus on a new genre he has created which he refers to as "pop art."

"This is not hip-hop music. Taking a sample, looping it and doing all that 'throw your hands up in the sky' thing has become such a cliche. Hip-hop is over for me. I sing, not rap, on this album. I now want to be grouped among those musicians you see in those old black-and-white photos - the Rolling Stones, Jimi Hendrix, the Beatles. And I'm not going to get there by doing just another rap album full of samples. I've had to create a whole new musical genre to describe what I'm doing now and I'm calling it 'pop-art' - which is not to be confused with the visual art movement."

Christ, where do I begin? Ok, first off, while I agree with Kanye's assessment of the hip-hop genre, it was ALREADY cliche when he came on to the scene, so the way I see it, he owes all of his success to the fact that it was already at the point where any moron can become a successful hip hop artist!

Secondly, The Rolling Stones, Jimi Hendrix, and the Beatles never used fucking auto-tune! A vocoder is NOT singing and a product it was used in should never be referred to as "art." Do people actually like the way that shit sounds? This is very troubling to me. Worst fucking invention in music since Britney Spears. And it's all your fault Cher.

Kanye recently compared the current musical landscape to the greatness of the 60's and 70's. Yeah, ok. Shit, the 90's (which sucked!) were better than most of the garbage that's out today. Know what people had in the 60's and 70's Kanye? Talent. These days, people decide they want to be stars before they even know if they have any talent. Because it doesn't matter anymore. Singles have replaced albums, autotune have replaced singing ability, The Pussycat Dolls have replaced The Supremes, and Guitar Hero has replaced guitars.

I sound like a pissy old fuck, I know, but maybe that's because I am one now and I finally understand where the pissy old fucks that used to complain about the synthesized music I loved as a child in the 80's and how it wasn't "real music" were coming from. And that shit was more "art" than today's crap!


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