Monday, February 26, 2007

Asshat of the Week!


This week's honor goes to our greasy friend Brandon Davis. Now normally, if you make Paris Hilton cry, you become awesome in my book, but NO ONE fucks with Paula Abdul! With Styrofoam flower-holders no less!

Here'what went down at (this week's) 26th birthday party for Paris Hilton according to the NY Daily News:

' The hotel heiress was reduced to tears after oily heir Brandon Davis' lewd behavior drove Courtney Love, Paula Abdul and others from the dinner celebrating Paris' 26th year, according to witnesses.

Around 10 p.m., Davis started acting up. "He was hurling flowers at Paula Abdul," says a guest. "Then he began bombing her with Styrofoam flower-holders. He was shouting, 'Lick my [BLEEP], Paula!' He started mocking her ancestry by speaking gibberish in an Arabic accent.

"Stavros and Paris tried to stop him. Paris said, 'Shut up, you're wasted!'" But it was too late. Abdul, who was due to sing "Happy Birthday," made an early exit.

Davis then turned his dim beams on Love. "He lifted her up so that she was straddling his waist," says a witness. "Her Chanel dress was riding up. Brandon was saying, 'I want to squirt on you.' He was humping Courtney in front of her daughter, Frances Bean. When he put her down, Courtney grabbed Frances and they marched out of the restaurant through the kitchen."

It didn't stop there. "He was knocking over glasses and candles on the table," says a source. "Paris was crying to her mother, 'This is not my fault!'"

After Davis was encouraged to leave, Paris blew out the candles on her cake and everyone headed to an after-party at her house.

"Incredibly, Brandon showed up at Paris' place," says a source. "Security guided him downstairs. They were under orders to keep him away from Paris."

A Davis family spokesman declined to comment and Brandon, whose infamous nightclub antics include dubbing Lindsay Lohan "Firecrotch," could not be reached. '

Dude, when Courtney "Suck on these, guy at Wendy's" Love is disgusted by you, you got problems.

Expect to hear about Brandon checking into rehab sometime later today.

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