Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Indiana Jones and the Dumbass from Oklahoma playing a Dancing Russian Soldier


PAGE SIX reports that one of the dumbass extras working on the new "Indiana Jones" film is in big trouble after revealing some of the movie's top-secret plot points in an interview with his hometown paper.

The entire cast and crew of "Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull" had to sign non-disclosure agreements by order of both George Lucas and Steven Spielberg (yeah,two people an aspiring actor really should NOT piss off) But "dancing Russian soldier" or maybe I should say "former-dancing Russian soldier" Tyler Nelson didn't quite understand that.

In an interview with Oklahoma's Edmond Sun newspaper Tyler revealed the followign spoilers:

* Indy, played once again by Harrison Ford, and the Soviet army are both searching for a priceless skull made of crystal in the jungles of South America. (well in Tyler's defense, you can get that much from the title)

* The Russians take Indy hostage and then blackmail him by threatening to kill his ex-girlfriend and mother of his son, Marion Ravenwood, portrayed by Karen Allen. Cast as the son is Shia LaBeouf.

* Cate Blanchett plays an evil Russian who grills Indy. "I saw Harrison Ford strapped to a chair and being interrogated," Nelson told the paper. Word is this one's false and that Nelson simply mistook Harrison's Acorn Stairlift for a set prop.

*There is no opening number by Kate Capshaw. (BOOOOO!)

Spielberg's spokesman, Marvin Levy, would not confirm or deny these spoilers but did say in response to Nelson: "Who knows whether that particular person will ever work in this town again?"

In too little too late news, Page Six contacted Nelson who said"No comment. I'm not supposed to talk about it."


Asshat Hollywood, however, was able to get a comment out of Tyler. We caught up with him on his way out of a meeting with the man below. When asked how he felt about everything, Tyler responded,
"My heart is broken."




We have also learned that the role of the dancing Russian soldier has been recast with Chris Crocker.

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