Asshat Idol - Top 5- Rat Pack

Surprisingly, last night on American Idol, the Idols stayed true to the Rat Pack theme. Everyone got all dressed up (except Simon and Randy) in their best formal wear and pretended that Jamie Fox was some kind of a legend and didn't say those things about Miley and can I just stop here for a minute and say that there is a rumor that NEXT WEEK IS ROCK WEEK AND SLASH IS THE MENTOR???????!!!!!!!!!! HOLY SHIT!! It hasn't been confirmed but if it's true it means that the Idol Gods have finally answered my prayers. This is television Reese's Cups for me! Please be true!! Oh my god.

Sorry, ok. Rat Pack. Standards.

OH HELL, HERE'S ADAM BECAUSE THAT'S ALL ANYBODY REALLY WANTS TO SEE ANYWAY:



Everything we've come to expect from Adam. Over-the-top, theatrical, crazy vocals, judges cream themselves (Kara, quite literally), etc, etc, etc.


THIS YEAR'S SYESHA:


Meaning hopefully she'll make top three (since it's clear Adam and Deadwife are 1 and 2 or 2 and 1, depending on whether dialidol is correct). Because anything less would suck.

DREADED FIRST SPOT:


Poor Kris. Despite gaining momentum these past few weeks, poor adorable Kris was stuck in the suicide spot this week. Even worse, he received good critiques from the judges, however later in the show the judges seemed to have developed amnesia and completely forgot that they liked him. I'm worried for him tonight. (sorry about the poor quality video)

Ok, while searching for valid YouTubes for the remaining contestants, I stumbled upon this awesomeness, so I'm gonna be lazy and let Sir Bitter take over from here with this week's recap: